国外也有段子手：范大厨危险！

小伙伴们大家好啊，欢迎收看本期“国外也有段子手”！冬歇期到了，各大联赛停摆，球星们要么和家人团聚，要么飞往各地度假，整个欧洲足坛呈现出一片祥和的景象……喂醒醒！英超哪来的冬歇期！你范厨师都危险了！

正在其他联赛休息的时候，英超各队还要迎接背靠背的苦逼赛程。在上周末节礼日的比赛中，利物浦1球小胜保(zheng)级(guan)队伍莱斯特城；切尔西2-2战平升班马沃特福德；阿四纳……不，阿森纳4球完败南安普顿。但最引人瞩目的还属红魔的比赛——曼联0-2客负斯托克城，各项赛事四连败，范加尔的帅位也变得岌岌可危。一起来看看国外段子手们对这轮英超的吐槽吧！

【曼联0-2客负斯托克城，德佩失误送大礼】

Tms12345(阿森纳球迷)：曼联过去七场比赛的战绩：平平平负负负负。哎哟我都没眼看了。(DDDLLLL that is embarrassing)

Thesolly180(利物浦球迷)：可能他们觉得每场都是0-0太无聊了。(They were sick of the boring 0-0s to be fair)

minusSeven(阿森纳球迷)： 曼联为什么输了？因为他们的后卫又小，又瞎，又年轻。(Why did Man u lost today? Because their defenders were blind, young and smalling.)

Rashiiddd(无主队球迷)：范佩西真该教教德佩什么才是真正的鱼跃冲顶。(RvP could show him how to do those properly.)

LiptonBlackTea(利物浦球迷)：此时此刻，在遥远的苏格兰，莫耶斯的嘴角划过了一丝不易察觉的微笑。(Somewhere in Scotland there is a man called David Moyes and he has a smirk on his face)

redditmiscer(曼联球迷)：所以…我们现在是新切尔西了？(So... Are we the new Chelsea ??)

Ketamine(德国球迷)：英格兰国家摆烂德比，周一见！(Tune in on Monday to find out!)

【利物浦1-0莱斯特城，本特克诡异空门不进】

bloo2004(曼联球迷)：本赛季，利物浦是唯一一支零封莱斯特城的球队。(Liverpool is the only team to have gotten a clean sheet against Leicester this season in all competitions.)

MundoOnly(利物浦球迷)：卧槽感觉我们要夺冠了！(WERE GONNA WIN THE LEAGUE)

pythongooner(阿森纳球迷)：本特克这想啥呢！(Holy shit Benteke.)

Crusaruis28(利物浦球迷)：当时我就想：这球停的真不错，是本特克的水平，这球肯定有了…再带一脚…然后我就懵逼了。(I was thinking, "Oh first time touch, a player of his calibre, 100% goal" YAY...Ok, second touch... WOW)

Nimblee(阿森纳球迷)：喝水哥的缺席太致命了，莱斯特城的中场完全失控。(The absence of Drinkwater really shows. Leicester had virtually no midfield control.)

Suneoc(利物浦球迷)：原来莱斯特城输球是因为缺水啊( ⊙ o ⊙ )( The dehydration cost Leicester the victory.)

【阿森纳0-4完败南安普顿，错失登顶良机】

WandererAboveFog(阿森纳球迷)：莱斯特：嘿！你的榜首--阿森纳：不，是你的榜首！(ayy Leicester we got u homie.)

(图)阿森纳和莱斯特城的榜首之争

berkeguzelaydin(加拉塔萨雷球迷)：致各位彩民：珍爱生命，远离英超！(PSA: Don't bet on premier leauge games for your own sanity)

haf12(热刺球迷)：这裁判真是把比赛毁了，阿森纳好好的0-2输球变成了0-4输球。啊，真是太不幸了。噫(The refs really screwed Arsenal. Game should've been 2-0 instead of 4-0. They should've lost the game instead they lost it. How unfortunate. /s)

GoldenLegs(无主队球迷)：错失登顶良机，今年阿森纳又是这样。(Typical Arsenal this year. Have a chance to go top of the table? Nah.)

Spursfan14-(热刺球迷)：仅仅是今年吗？哈哈。(This year? Lol)

DJBJ(阿森纳球迷)：妈的，根本无力反驳。(So true it hurts)

toblu(阿森纳球迷)：就当圣诞节送温暖了吧。(It's Christmas, after all.)

【切尔西2-2战平沃特福德，奥斯卡失点】

Joshwright111(沃特福德球迷)：切尔西就不能再烂几天吗？(Couldn't Chelsea have stayed shit for longer so we could've won?)

scarecrowslayer(惠灵顿球迷)：不仅赢不了切尔西，还和曼联同分(积分榜)，沃特福德踢得真臭。(Can't beat Chelsea, level with United. Hard times in Watford.)

CoolHandHazard(切尔西球迷)：身为一支排15名的队伍，战平第6，这结果也不坏嘛。(We're in 15th place. Drawing with the number 6 team ain't bad)

CoolstorySteve(球迷)：好，滑倒了，道理我都懂。可是特么的为什么是奥斯卡去罚点球！(I know he slipped and it doesn't happen often but why the fuck is Oscar the penalty taker in the first place?)

Armandhino(切尔西球迷)：嘿，至少我们没输~(Hey, at least we didn't lose ;))